ROVERS, SKY1, 10pm

EVEN if you don’t enjoy this new sitcom, you can have great fun identifying all the famous faces who star in it.

You’ll find Craig Cash and Sue Johnston of The Royle Family, Diane Morgan, better known as Philomena Cunk, and countless other naggingly recognisable faces from TV comedy.

The show is about the lowly football club Redbridge Rovers, who play in the dismal Evo-Stik First Division North. Hopes are high because they have a new Hungarian player; he “works on the buses but he’s got a real eye for goals!”

But the comedy isn’t about the game. It’s about the sad characters who work for the club and spend their days in its miserable, draughty bar where they gossip, sing songs of pretended glory and fantasise about promotion to the top league: “Imagine … playing the likes of Nantwich!”


THE QUEEN MARY: GREATEST OCEAN LINER, BBC2, 9pm

THE Titanic sucks up oceans of attention, so here comes the Queen Mary – “bigger and more powerful than the Titanic … taller than the Eiffel Tower” – trailing war, luxury, celebrity and Scottish shipbuilding genius in her wake.

The massive Queen Mary was built on the Clyde and began her maiden voyage in the summer of 1936, a time when the world was recovering from the Depression and ready to embrace luxury and good times again yet, simultaneously, the shadow of war was lengthening in Europe.

The Queen Mary took her passengers across the Atlantic, “luxuriously cocooned in a floating palace”, but in a few short years would find herself hard at work transporting armies across the seas, and acting as the “Churchillian equivalent to Air Force One”.

During the war Hitler offered a reward to any U-Boat commander who could sink her, but she outsmarted them all.