DEAR Angry,

I am both a Yes supporter and a Leave voter. Contrary to the opinion of the First Minister, we do actually exist. As you can no doubt imagine, mutually supporting Scottish independence and Brexit makes me about as popular as a pork chop in a synagogue these days. This is not helped by both endeavours being headed by alarmingly foolhardy and calamitous politicians.

Nicola Sturgeon’s on-again, off-again relationship with self-determination has left me feeling like a donkey ogling a dangling carrot. The announcement and immediate withdrawal of ScotRef appeared as strong and stable as Theresa May on a pair of stilts made from P45s. Moreover, the remainder of the Yes movement’s top brass now appears to be comprised of lawsuit-wielding bloggers, echo chamber enthusiasts and opportunistic leftists who use the cause merely as a flag of convenience.

Of course, the political indiscretions of Scottish nationalists pale in comparison to the titanic idiocy of Brexiter Boris Johnson. If brains were petrol, his couldn’t propel an ant’s motorbike around a raindrop. Making this man Foreign Secretary is akin to making a hippopotamus squadron leader of the local gliding club. How on Earth am I supposed to tell people that I do not believe in the European Union when such a view puts me in the same category as this mop-headed simpleton?

Fraser Hunter, East Kilbride

ONE of the problems with politics is that you will inevitably find that causes you passionately believe in are represented by clowns. Whilst I may disagree with your blunt assessment of the Yes movement, as well as your support of Brexit, I do sympathise with you feeling like your respective teams are managed by people that you wouldn’t trust to run a bath. Having your political position championed by Boris Johnson must feel like having your local swimming team captained by a brick.

Whilst some have suggested that beneath Bojo’s bumbling antics there is a mind of great political intellect, I have always believed that Mr Johnson is merely a narcissistic baboon with a Union Jack fetish and a thesaurus. Whereas the politics of a Jacob Rees-Mogg appear to be calculated and deliberate, Boris simply comes across as the Trump-baby that never quite grew up. Nevertheless, Johnson is the subject of much adulation in certain quarters of Westminster – quarters with a seemingly limitless capacity to forgive his wrongdoings. Like the shaggy dog who sometimes fouls in the hallway, Boris receives the occasional rebuke and runs off to chase squirrels in the park.

On the face of it, the only explanation for Bojo’s continued employ is the residual and highly misguided fandom he gained following his appearance on the BBC’s Have I Got News For You programme. Boris’s performance as the loveable English oaf seems to have excused a whole multitude of sins in the eyes of his Conservative colleagues. For whatever reason, they believe that his is the sort of backwards personality that best represents Great Britain on the world stage.

Sadly, British nationalism has dragged the UK into a very dark reality where Boris Johnson’s casual insensitivity, ignorance and egotism have been almost completely normalised by the media and the government.

I occasionally wonder if he is some sort of Tory Frankenstein, created in underground Westminster labs by crazed Conservative scientists intent on forming the perfect neo-colonial politician. How else might we explain why Westminster won’t entertain the prospect of a second independence referendum in Scotland, but seem happy to tolerate the blundering monstrosity that is Boris?

Worse yet, this seemingly unstoppable creature is now stomping its way towards the most powerful office in the land. In a classic example of failing upwards, Johnson’s name is being bandied about as a possible replacement for Theresa May. As much as I appreciate that some Tories might believe it better to have bolt-neck Boris in the government urinating out, rather having him outside the government weeing in, to have granted him as prominent a position as he currently holds defies all rationality. If anything, it puts another feather in his already far too plumy hat, and gives the entirely false impression that he has the qualities expected of a Prime Minister.

In the end, Bojo’s position in the government is essentially Brexit in microcosm. It is a bold salute to the British wrongs of yesteryear and a blind determination to repeat them going into the future. It champions idiocy over intellect and patriotism over pragmatism.

As much as a political ideology should not necessarily be judged purely by the behaviours of one man, it’s extremely hard not to encourage Brexiters to take a long hard look at the hideous antics of Boris Johnson. Woefully, he encapsulates everything that a Tory-led Brexit will be about, and even the most vocal opponent of the EU must surely see that this only spells doom for the country.