IF you wonder why former prime minister David Cameron is overcome with gratitude for current Prime Minister Boris Johnson, let me suggest it’s not unconnected with allegations of sleaze and general bad behaviour on Cameron’s part being wiped from the headlines.
Sticking a favoured financial services pal at a desk in the Cabinet Office still makes him dodgy Dave. Having his ex-ministerial colleagues on speed dial and allegedly harassing them to help him boost his share options with his new employer is not suddenly A-OK.
But, in the news desks of English-based media outlets, they suddenly have bigger political fish to fry.
It seems that anything dodgy Dave can do, Boris can do better. It’s an Old Etonian thing.
Remember when they were just innocent Bullingdon Boys together, getting off their heads in hostelries, trashing the joint, then chucking a few dozen tenners at the luckless owners? That’s the kind of upbringing which let’s you know that rules are just for the little people.
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So, hopefully temporarily, Cameron is off the media hook, hunkered down in one of his three homes, or maybe hiding out in that super duper shepherd’s hut. There are just so many places for an upmarket boy to lay his weary head.
Meanwhile, a fresh set of media bombs are being detonated under his successor.
Did Boris really say that he’d rather pile up dead Covid bodies than lock the pubs down again? Who paid for his fiancée to turn a rather smart pad into an affront to taste?
And if he got a cheque for that vandalism from an old mate, why hasn’t that intelligence found its way into the register of interests?
How come the chap supposed to check up on ministerial standards hasn’t been replaced five months after he resigned? (Over Priti Patel keeping her post despite being found guilty as charged of bullying her way round Whitehall.)
Just so many fires for Boris to fight that poor old Dave’s “misdemeanours” have dropped off the media radar.
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Yet here’s the thing. All this has been splashed over the English media with former Tory cheerleaders like the Daily Mail putting the boot in big time. Political editors are being wheeled out every hour on the hour to clutch their pearls (or whatever the boys do) and speculate that this time the great escapologist might have been caught bang to rights.
'Colin, you can make me whole again.'
— STV News (@STVNews) April 26, 2021
Anas Sarwar displayed his dancing skills to Bruno Mars' Uptown Funk on Saturday.
And now Scottish Conservative leader Douglas Ross has shown off his moves - inspired by Atomic Kitten - to STV political editor Colin Mackay. pic.twitter.com/4VC0RwrPOH
Meanwhile, back at the Scottish media ranches, here’s wee Dougie supping a welcome pint and reciting his fave Atomic Kitten lyrics on screen. (Really? Atomic kitten?)
Big bad Boris is well down the headlines and filmed practising his table tennis backhand smash in one of his trademark Johnson on tour Hi Vis jackets.
He gets about does Boris, except if the gig is north of Carlisle. The man who said wild horses wouldn’t stop him campaigning in the Scottish election has obviously run across a more ferocious equine posse than he thought.
So whilst his spokespeople intone that Covid makes travel difficult for the boss, what they actually mean is that the boss travelling up to Scotland is the very last thing to help the Tory cause here.
Dougie Ross knows that fine well. In fact that pint he was downing was in celebration of his learning that the man from No 1- would not be troubling the tartan natives.
Phew! Cheers!
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