WHAT would you do if you became world-famous overnight? How would you feel? Few people can answer those questions from experience, and Chappell Roan is one of them.

A couple of months ago, I could not have told you that no man can get it hot like Papa John. And a couple of months before that, I couldn’t even have told you who Chappell Roan was. How embarrassing for my former self, but clearly I was not alone.

It was nine months after the launch of Roan’s critically-acclaimed first studio album The Rise And Fall Of A Midwest Princess – and several years after some of its songs were first released – when it entered the US Billboard 200 chart for the first time in June. The same month, the album reached the UK’s top 10, and by August it was number 2 in the US and number 1 in the UK.

At the Lollapalooza festival in Chicago at the start of this month, the 26-year-old pop artist drew the biggest crowd ever seen at the event.

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Tickets to her sold-out gig at the O2 Academy in Glasgow next month originally sold for as little as £23.20. Now, the only ones available on resale websites are more than £1500 (but that’s a rant for another day).

This meteoric rise to fame is a lot to process as a casual observer, never mind how it must feel for the person experiencing all of it. So, it’s hardly surprising that Roan has expressed feelings of being overwhelmed, telling fans at a concert in June that she was “having a hard time” because her career was “going really fast”.

Neither is it surprising, in light of an increasingly obsessive celebrity culture, that Roan felt the need to release video statements last week saying that she will not tolerate “abuse, harassment, stalking”, or otherwise “creepy” behaviour by so-called fans.

Specifically, she requested that people stop shouting at her from their car; getting mad at her for not wanting to stop and take a photo with them in the street; following her around; stalking members of her family, and dissecting her life.

All perfectly reasonable asks, one would think. But if you hadn’t noticed by now, we don’t live in a very reasonable world – so, of course, Roan has been met with a barrage of criticism and even mockery for having the audacity to assert her right to privacy and personal boundaries.

“What did you expect?” is the crux of how some social media users have responded, just as they have to those celebrities – most often women – before her who have similarly sought to criticise or distance themselves from unwanted behaviours by members of the public.

For all the talk of progress on respecting women’s boundaries or respecting women full stop, the resounding message to women entering – or thinking about entering – public life is the same as it ever was: they had better be grateful for their position and take everything that comes their way with a smile, or they can be kicked right back off their pedestal as quickly as they got there.

In Roan’s case, the answer to the loaded question “what did you expect?” is probably a particularly far cry from what her life has so quickly become. Her year began as the support act on tour with Olivia Rodrigo. Only after she performed at the Coachella music festival in California and released her new song, Good Luck Babe, both in April, did her fame begin its sharp ascent.

In July, vice-president Kamala Harris’s presidential campaign used Roan’s song, Femininomenon in a TikTok video, and then released campaign caps emblazoned “Harris Waltz” in the style of Roan’s own “Midwest Princess” caps. “Is this real?,” Roan posted in reply to the photo – probably as much an existential question as a literal one.

The value Roan places on separating her personal life from her public persona was built into her career plans through the use of a pseudonym and drag-inspired costumes and make-up.

But really, none of this matters. Whatever level of fame a person is aiming for, however popular their art becomes, this should never negate their right to protect their physical and emotional boundaries.

For some, Roan’s message is valid, but the delivery is a step too far.

“I’m a random bitch, you’re a random bitch,” Roan said in her video, referring to those fans who invade her privacy and personal space. The singer should have been nicer, more polite, in her word choice and tone, some people have said. Why, exactly?

In response to some of the backlash, Roan posted another video in which she said: “When a woman is upset and says something, the automatic response is to be like, ‘Yo chill’. It’s not chill, so I’m not going to be chill.”

Most women won’t know what it feels like to wake up one day to thousands upon thousands of people talking about you – and to you, and at you – but many will resonate with that statement nonetheless.

When recounting experiences of behaviour which she has understandably found distressing, a woman doesn’t owe you a demure and mindful attitude (to reference another viral trend of the moment). Nobody does.

For all that Roan is getting the flak for raising this now, and doing so unapologetically, she is evidently far from alone in feeling this way. Paramore frontwoman Hayley Williams shared Roan’s post about the issue on Instagram, adding: “This happens to every woman I know in this business, myself included. Social media has made this worse.”

There are lessons we are all supposed to have learned by now about the importance of consent and of listening – really listening – when someone tells you they aren’t comfortable. Sadly it feels like our rapidly changing world is bringing with it new and harmful lessons that we will need to work just as hard to unpack all over again.

The omnipresence of social media has made our connection to celebrities feel stronger than ever, leading to ever-deeper “parasocial relationships” – those in which someone experiences a one-sided attachment to people who don’t even know they exist.

For some, this is only fuelling a misplaced sense of ownership or entitlement to the lives of people they follow online. Throw in all the pre-existing biases people have – like beliefs about how women should or shouldn’t behave – and this makes for a very troubling situation.

For now, I’m just thanking that high-profile celebrities like Chappell Roan are putting themselves on the line to challenge this warped culture.

And I seriously hope that, in spite of it all, she won’t give up on “throw[ing] f****** parties for gay people onstage”, as she describes it – because that’s a party I want to go to someday, and I still believe we deserve nice things.