BORDERLINE, C5, 10pm
I DON’T look to Channel 5 for comedy. I don’t look to them for anything, really, unless I’ve taken a severe blow to the head and want to recover by watching Big Brother and car chases.
So I was surprised to find myself e-mailing their press team about this new show.
It’s a spoof documentary set in the fictional Northend Airport and follows the bungling Border Force as they try to cope with directives from the Home Office that order them to keep out the bad guys whilst remaining politically correct and most definitely not using that awfully bad word – profiling. “No-one is using that word!” gasps the boss. So when an Arab passenger turns up draped in a headscarf and white robes, the beleaguered official sighs, “Aw man! We’re definitely gonna have to ask you some questions.” But definitely not in a “profiley” way…
It’s topical, yes, but at the same time feels very dated. The spoof documentary set in an incompetent workplace was done to perfection by The Office back in 2001. This often feels like a tepid tribute act, but does have some good moments.
BRITAIN’S POMPEII: A VILLAGE LOST IN TIME, BBC4, 9pm
THE real Pompeii was part of the glorious Roman civilisation and met its end in spectacular fashion. The “British Pompeii”, on the other hand, is very British indeed, being a recently discovered village buried in the marshy fenland of Cambridgeshire, covered in centuries of muck, drizzle and dampness.
Three thousand years ago, a Bronze Age settlement caught fire and its ruins gradually sank into the mud. Luckily, the boggy earth contained peat, which has preserved much of the contents. Now some excited archaeologists are at work to excavate this “perfectly preserved time capsule that’s been dubbed The British Pompeii” and take us inside a reconstructed Bronze Age home that's been reconstructed using the various unearthed tools, fabrics and utensils.
The show also asks what started the dreadful fire all those years ago. Could it have been an act of arson or was it just a terrible accident?
Why are you making commenting on The National only available to subscribers?
We know there are thousands of National readers who want to debate, argue and go back and forth in the comments section of our stories. We’ve got the most informed readers in Scotland, asking each other the big questions about the future of our country.
Unfortunately, though, these important debates are being spoiled by a vocal minority of trolls who aren’t really interested in the issues, try to derail the conversations, register under fake names, and post vile abuse.
So that’s why we’ve decided to make the ability to comment only available to our paying subscribers. That way, all the trolls who post abuse on our website will have to pay if they want to join the debate – and risk a permanent ban from the account that they subscribe with.
The conversation will go back to what it should be about – people who care passionately about the issues, but disagree constructively on what we should do about them. Let’s get that debate started!
Callum Baird, Editor of The National
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules here