The National:

ON Wednesday, the Jouker reported how the Unionist attack dogs with their sights set on Patrick Harvie would have to go without their dinner after an attempted Freedom of Information (FOI) attack fell embarrassingly flat.

Now, it would seem those dogs are in danger of wasting away as yet another sly FOI has failed to uncover any skeletons in the closet.

This one was aimed at the First Minister, and it would seem to have been in somebody’s holster for some time, making the misfire even more awkward.

On January 1, 2022, an FOI was submitted asking to be told the “number of complaints made about the First Minister in 2019, 2020 and 2021”. (They had to wait for the final year in question to be over before submitting, we suppose).

What a scoop they would have if Nicola Sturgeon were to have been formally complained about, even once.

The BBC would no doubt have covered in the fall-out for weeks. The front pages would write themselves.

Unfortunately for the baying hounds, things didn't go to plan.

The Government responded: “The answer to your question is that no formal complaints within a complaints policy were received about the First Minister during the calendar years 2019, 2020 or 2021.”

Who could have guessed.