I DIDN'T catch FMQs live on Thursday because I was out on a driving lesson and busy wondering how, despite all the hours I have chalked up and all the money I have dished out, my driving seems to be getting worse, not better.
But skipping the question and answer session entirely wasn’t an option.
I could have written that Douglas Ross had huffed and puffed and Anas Sarwar had indulged in a bit of grandstanding and you probably wouldn’t have been able to tell that I hadn’t actually tuned in.
But it would have been dishonest and I’d know, even if you didn’t.
A woman without principles is a woman who is probably a shoe-in to become the next Tory leader and that’s frankly not a route I want to take in life.
And so, in a clear sign that my life is going badly wrong, I watched FMQs on catch-up, like a total dork.
With the First Minister in New York attending the United Nations Climate Ambition Summit, it was up to Deputy First Minister Shona Robison to act as stand-in.
Reading the room with as much skill as an over-tired toddler on an aeroplane, Douglas Ross kicked things off by asking about North Sea oil.
Now, I’m no political strategist, but this would seem a somewhat risky opening gambit, given Rishi Sunak’s recent, much-criticised decision to delay key net zero targets.
Douglas Ross referenced comments made by the First Minister on at the climate summit, that Scotland would "no longer be the oil and gas capital of Europe" and he asked why the SNP had "turned sour" on oil and gas.
The Scottish Parliament could be under 100ft of water and being regularly battered by summer hurricanes and autumn wildfires and the Scottish Tories would still be arguing against any transition to green energy.
In response, Shona Robison said that the "unlimited extraction of fossil fuels is not consistent with Scotland’s ambitious climate obligations".
READ MORE: Shona Robison slams Douglas Ross over 'shouting her down'
She went on to say that Douglas Ross was "brave" for going on that particular topic, "in a week where Rishi Sunak has essentially pulled the rug from under the net zero ambitions".
"He should be ashamed to stand side-by-side with Rishi Sunak on that matter," she added.
Douglas Ross branded the response "predictable" and said that the SNP "like to talk a good game" on climate change, but "keep missing their own targets".
Shona Robison was having none of it, reminding Douglas Ross that he had previously urged the Scottish Government to back Liz Truss’s disastrous mini-budget, "over the cliff-edge of her economic catastrophe" and now he asks that they follow Rishi Sunak "over the same cliff-edge of reneging and back sliding on net zero targets".
She then attempted to explain her party’s commitment to a just transition for the energy sector, but was soon drowned out by loud braying and blethering from the Scottish Tory benches.
The Presiding Officer intervened, describing the din as "somewhat robust" and asking that it stop.
"I’ve never allowed a man to shout me down in my life and I won’t be making any exceptions for Douglas Ross," replied the Deputy First Minister.
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